and the winners are....

Janice from GA and the almost dead-now Rabbitch. Why both of them? Not only did both write brilliantly clever tell-off resignation letters, both in very different styles, but both were the only brave souls who submitted them. Plus, I feel sorry for Rabbitch for being so old she's almost dead, and I want to give her a consolation prize. So, Janice from Georgia, whom I've actually met in person, please either email me your address so I can send you your prize or let's make plans to meet up in person.

My offer letter has not arrived yet. The sign off is on the vice president's desk. Then it goes to the recruiter who checks my references. Who then sends the offer letter. When they get the offer letter back they start the background check. After I'm cleared I can tell off Napoleon.

When will it ever end?

We're afraid the vice president will be vindictive and not sign off, actually. It's a bit of a concern. Seriously.

I ripped out all progress on the cashmere pepto-pink scarf and restarted it using an Aran pattern in Vogue Knitting On the Go Scarves Two. I'm much happier. People are more impressed, and after all, isn't that why we all knit, to impress others?

Sorry for that dose of sarcasm. Napoleon came to my desk yesterday wearing the most godawful piece of crap I'd ever seen.

Now, I like new knitters. I never diss new knitters. I know new knitters can do very...creative work. I have been teaching people to knit for more than 15 years and I've been knitting for 23 years.

However.

This piece of crap was "knit" for Napoleon by the "fat ex-girlfriend." She decided that "knitting was trendy" and therefore "she should do it." She apparently taught herself and this was her seventh "scarf." Not first, not even fourth, but seventh. She apparently also thinks it's perfect. I am not nor was I ever delusional about my knitting. I can see my errors. She cannot see hers. Napoleon jealously ogled and fondled (*shudder*) my cashmere Aran scarf yesterday, proclaiming that his Antoinette was no itgirl.

Are you as creeped out as I am by this exchange?

And how do you tell someone who is clearly not meant to be a knitter that they need to give it up? Particularly if she's delusional? I've only run into one such student in the about 75 people I've taught to knit.

Hypnotic website of the day.