Saturday, April 08, 2006

soylent grün ist menschenfleisch

Yeah. I actually had to Google the correct spelling of those lyrics.

Props to Jess!!!!! She'sthe best!!!!!

Can you tell I'm uh, drunk? Hey! I'm in DC!

So I wrote this at the Atlanta airpot this morning on my fancy schmancy new MacBook Pro that I love so hard.

So here I am sitting in the Atlanta airport and I said okay, I'll join the wireless network "ATL-WIFI" but I won't pay for it so I opened iTunes to just you know, create new playlists because I never seem to have time to create playlists any other time, and whammo! You know how with iTiunes you can see other people's music libraries if they're on your wireless network? So I can see Kris's Music library. You know, the only person with an open laptop around here is a withered, tiny Chinese man who looks to be about 70 years old. Either he isn't Kris, or he's hipper that I thought. Let's see what Kris listens to, shall we?

"Feed My Frankenstein." Alice Cooper at his finest.

The entire Alice in Chains discography. Okay, not such bad taste in music...

The entire Yes discography. I take that back.

I wonder if I can figure out how to copy all of his music.

So then I came to DC and I went to Stitch DC and I whined to Jess about how I was unenamored of anything I'm working on knitting wise, Melissa and I talked about this the other night, and I got there and we opened One Skein and whammo! There was a crocheted scarf and I kept asking hey, how many skeins will it take to make this? Because I. Am. A. Dumbass. So Jess assured me I could make the crocheted ruffle cravat in one skank of Blue Sky Alpaca Worsted and I got the green and made two pattern repeats (of ten) and decided I had fucked it up and so did Jess and I grogged it I mean frogged it and started over and made the exact same fuckups so I guess they weren't even fuckups and yes, I. Am. A. Dumbass. And I stood outside in the frigid air, two repeats done, and waited for the bus and did three repeats on the bus and the other five in the bar and here I was, all ends woven in and everything
and here is how much yarn I had leftover
and here is Jess wearing a shitbuttsnatchugly Debbie Bliss sweater, oh my fucking FSM is it ugly, and it makes any wearer look fat, just see before
and after
she's like a cow man. And all because of Debbie Bliss' assugly designs.

So here's a closeup of the One Skank scarf
and here's me looking bad and drunk in a random hat I don't quite remember how I got.
Gomna pass out. After I eat.


Anonymous jess said...

You took home the hat that got sweeped up from the bar floor the night before. Someone most likely left it behind because it had been puked on. You will now be known as puke head.

12:25 PM  
Blogger Mouse said...

I'm still waiting for my copy of 'One Skein' - stupid bastards at Amazon are holding it hostage because I got the "free shipping" instead of paying to get it sooner. Scarf looks nice from what I can see of it..

2:11 PM  
Blogger jodi said...

Okay, how the hell do you get on to the WIFI in the Atlanta airport for free? I had to wait there for five freaking hours there the other day, sans internet.

8:29 PM  
Blogger Delia said...

Haa Haa.. drunk blogging to a new level! Excellent!

12:32 PM  

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